(913 quotes found)
“When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.”
Contributed by: Dafna Sharon
R.C. Sherriff
“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating......and you finish off as an orgasm.”
George Carlin
“The only thing missing from the retirement party for Blair was a gold clock. It's quite clear that there's an orderly handover taking place. What we saw is the new leader.”
Paul Kenny
“Everyone keeps asking, 'When's John going to retire? Is this a retirement party?' and I tell them what's the difference, ... (Assistant General Manager Bernie Cooper) runs the town anyway.”
Bill McCoy
“It's absolutely incredible, and his retirement should be a celebration more than anything else.”
Randy Cross
“I think he would like to help the Democratic party retire the debt, and he's been working hard at it.”
Mike McCurry
“And I look forward to seeing all of you in four or five years when we have the next Nellie retirement party in another town.”
Gregg Popovich
“We're going to see a kind of old Democratic Party, new Democratic Party kind of split on this. I think in the end that individual control of part of the retirement Social Security funds has got to happen,”
Joseph Lieberman
“It seeks to ban him from ever doing business in this state again. He is gone. It's time to throw Mr. Kafka a retirement party.”
Melissa Merz
“In the old days the people at the senior centers were white American women, usually 75 years old or older, who played Bingo or participated in parties. Now they are newly retired seniors who are either pursuing a second career and staying up in their computer skills, taking a second language or there to meet others.”
Cheryl Laferty
