(3665 quotes found)
“The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time”
Friedrich Nietzsche
“You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”
Bob Hope
“I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.”
Rodney Dangerfield
“Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?"”
Annie Dillard
“Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year”
Victor Borge
“You grow up the day you have your first real laugh -- at yourself.”
Ethel Barrymore
“One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.”
A. A. Milne
“I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.”
Michael Davis
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
Miss Piggy
“Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework”
Bill Cosby
